Why You Should Love Your Doctor

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Doctors spend their 20s and 30s studying while most of their friends are at parties and enjoying their youth.

Doctors may amass up to 500K debt for the honor of one day caring for you and your family.

Doctors delay childbearing and starting their own families so they can care for your family.

Doctors miss their own kids’ ballet recitals and baseball games so they can care for your kids and family.

Doctors get out of bed and leave their husbands and wives in the middle of the night to care for your sick husband or wife.

Doctors—while “off-duty” and “on vacation”–may save your life on an airplane, in a swimming pool, shopping mall, or car accident.

Doctors suffer with you. They carry your pain home with them.

Doctors may be hazed, bullied, and abused by professors, patients, employers, insurance companies, politicians, and the media, but they keep caring for you and your family.

Doctors are commonly sleep deprived and exhausted. They skip meals and bathroom breaks so they can keep caring for all the people like you and your family who need them.

Doctoring is not a 9 to 5 job. Your doctor may still be thinking about you and your illness while trying to fall asleep at night.

Doctors have PTSD from decades of witnessing trauma. Doctors have the highest rate of suicide of any profession.

Today, tell your doctor, “I love you.” The life you save may save you.

Sadly, our doctors are dying. Here’s why:

Pamela Wible, M.D., is a family physician in Oregon. She offers physician retreats where she helps doctors recover from their abuse so they can get back to caring for their patients. Image by Shutterstock.

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22 comments on “Why You Should Love Your Doctor
  1. Tamara Miller says:

    Love this post! Thank you for making us aware. I am lucky I don’t need to be seen by a doctor much — yet, but someday I probably will and I am so lucky to know it’s you!

  2. Debberdoo says:

    Thank you for all that you are, and all that you do, Pamela! Doctors such as yourself are changing the landscape of healing. Kudos!

  3. Daniel Herzberg says:

    Thanks for this Pam. It’s too easy to overlook how much doctors sacrifice.

  4. Steven Levitz DPM says:

    So True
    Divorce rate 10-20% higher than general population in America.
    Plus Drug Adiction/Alcoholism/which leads to higher suicide rates than the general public.
    BUT a Real Doctor wants to ALLWAYS help their patients even though they have so many personal problems.
    just my opinion
    Steve Levitz DPM
    New York

    • Pamela Wible MD says:

      And our profession should afford us the care we need so we can keep caring for others. Correct?

  5. Papa says:

    Dr. Wible, thanks for showing what the other side goes through. Much of the time when we go visit the doctor, we are so caught up in our own medical issues that we never for a moment consider that our doctor is as human as we are and not this super being that we put on a pedestal.
    And by the way do “we love you”. 🙂

  6. Julie Greene says:

    I spent my 20’s and 30’s misdiagnosed and locked up in mental hospitals because of incompetent medical professionals. There were no children, no ballet recitals, no baby showers to miss. My family was torn apart because of the lies told told by bad doctors. My nephews and niece were told Auntie Julie was “crazy” and not worth associating with. I did not attend any Eagle scout award party nor see any of them graduate. I lived most of my life in poverty, not 9 to 5 poverty, but 24/7 poverty, because of bad doctors. I couldn’t get a job because of this “diagnosis’ hanging over my head. Finally, I tried to get a lawyer. I found out they are overrun with such abuse cases, and wouldn’t take me on. Do you think I’m gonna KISS my doctor? I want every single one of them to face me right now, and APOLOGIZE. Yes, say they are sorry for what they did and to say they will never do this again to anyone else. I want them to know the precise consequences of their actions. Happily, decades later, my little dog and I are alive and okay and together. We barely made it. Julie Greene and Puzzle

    • Pamela Wible MD says:

      I am so sorry you had to endure such suffering Julie. I apologize for what you went through.

    • William Bennett says:

      Julie,

      The only thing that we can truly do in the face of such suffering is practice forgiveness and compassion, and ask ourselves what can we learn from this situation. There is always something that we can learn – that we can give meaning to. These are practices that empower us, rather than give our power away. From there, we can help others to avoid similar situations.

      You barely made it – but you made it. Sounds like you are an incredibly resilient and strong and a survivor.

      Glad you made it!

    • SteveofCaley says:

      Thank you, Julie. I grieve for your loss, and I am glad you have the breath left to share your story.
      I apologize for the cruelty of our profession and society. Our job is to help people live the best lives that they can. I hope you can thrive from now on.

  7. Karuna says:

    I love you Pamela! and Dr Frattiani too. Karuna

  8. SteveofCaley says:

    Yay, and thanks, Pam! The entirety of real medicine is when the patient and the doctor are meeting together. There is nothing else that is critical to care – all the other stuff is merely there to support this team effort. Doctoring is humanity at its best, and that’s why I’m a doctor. If I can’t be a human doctor, I’ll sadly get another job.

    • Serena says:

      I disagree with you. I think every member of the team is just as important as the physician. In the hospital setting, we are there to learn our patient and give orders for the best treatment, but we’re not the ones actually administering that treatment. The nursing staff, cafeteria, pharmacy, janitorial, etc all ensure proper care, management, and safety for our patients. This mentality that a doctor is the only person in medicine who matters is a damaging and belittling attitude that can lead to worse patient outcomes. You should appreciate every person who is helping to care for your patient. Part of that is realizing their importance as well.

  9. Steven Levitz DPM says:

    Hello Pamela you are a buitfull peroson phycically and internally
    I have been in priate practice for 34 yrs my rent is beeing constanty increased and witin the next 2 yrs i would considering closing my private practices.
    I have ben a 3/4 time proffesaor at the
    new York College of
    podiartic medicine for 35 yrs where I work for 20 plus hours per week
    I treat patients /instruct coures and give lectures
    They have apporced me to work more hours and become FULTIME

    In YOuR Respective opionin what should I DO?
    My private office is a rental and I currently pay too much and it will only increase Plus I am not EHR compliant and will stay to my written documents as lohg as I can
    Sincerly;
    Respectfully
    Steven Levitz DPM

    PS Althought I do not coment
    If I had a dolar for every patient I treated gratice I would be a millonare

    Sincerwly and wich much respect
    Steven Levitz DPM
    New York

  10. martina Nicholson says:

    Bless you for pointing out the stresses and strains underlying being a physician. It is a big thing for us to be thanked, for our patients to have eyes filled with gratitude. What is very deadening and difficult is people who are so cynical as to believe a doctor does not WANT to cure you! Sometimes you shoot the messenger, when they bring bad news, but knowing it is not what doctors WANT to do is very important. We have developed a doctor-patient relationship, and we honor that. We care about the little gains in health and well-being, as well as the big things. Thanks again for saying this.

  11. Shannon says:

    This is beautiful. I think it applies to anyone in healthcare.

  12. bonnie says:

    keep going Pamela you are doing a great job, in letting people know , why doctors are killing themselves and making it present to all people of the world and to not be so hard on doctors. Yes like you say love your doctor! <3

  13. Janice Gearhart says:

    Hi Pam,
    I understand the stress doctors and medical providers are under. I have a CRNP that goes out of his way to provided for me. Then there’s this need lately to have you bounce around with a list of doctors trying to find a certifiable reason for how I feel. Let’s put it this way if it wasn’t for Michael Mewes and staff. My hope for answers from the medical community would be led than satisfactory. Thanks,
    J.Gearhart

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